Since my last journal things have continued to feel bleary. I had a week of feeling positively in mid December, but most of the time before and afterwards I’ve been treading water. I can congratulate myself on an especially productive few weeks of December, and even though I anticipated bringing the week of the Holidays down to “low activity” I still can’t help but shake a feeling of unease with resting. Why is that?

I can feel my energy levels spinning back up from the weariness of the holidays.

Socially, things have been especially active this month, though perhaps that’s because I take my biweekly therapy sessions into account for social events. I think next month I’ll create a Therapy activity instead.

Mid-month, I felt so glad to be feeling better, and now even though I feel worse again there’s a sense of peace that comes with it, a knowledge that with my new employment right around the corner things might finally stabilize in the coming months. I feel a cautious optimism, or at least a cautious sense of security for the future.

If this is life then here I am, living.